donderdag 22 december 2016

To find out who you are and what you want

(I only use my own pictures in blog posts and videos)

To find out who you are (and eventually find out what you want) you have to go back in time. Years back in time.
The times when you were a little kid, starting to develop your own personality more and more. Starting to want. Starting to dream.
Go back to where your personality was as untouched as possible.
Untouched by outside influences like the people around you, the people you look up tp, teachers, television, internet and so on
Your own wants and needs are your true nature.
We shouldn't ignore our true nature, because it's how we should live our lifes. What makes us as happy and fullfilled as possible.

'Geke why are you sitting on the bench?' Asks my gym teacher to the 6 year old me. 'I don't like doing things others tell me to do and I want to quit gym' was my simple answer.

I could never do things when others wanted me to do it. I suddenly felt myself not wanting it anymore and rebelling against it.
Still I always found myself living up to what is expected.
I didn't have a voice. The young me was shy and this developed in social anxiety, because I felt uncomfortable and judged when I was around people. I was afraid to speak up and say what was on my mind.
Behind all of that I very much had strong opinions, believes, dreams..
but different than most other kids and grown ups. One of the reasons I couldn't speak up and had problems with really developing my own wants and needs.

Over the years I showed this in all kinds of ways, but not with my voice.
I dressed different, I listened to different music, I liked to spend my time different, rebelled against the things all teen girls were starting to like. Still I tried to fit into a certain group.
At one point all of this changed and I just went with the flow. Just did what was expected.
And it followed with depressions.

These depressions made me think and made me reflect on the 'why?'.
It takes time and it takes (life) experience to get to the point when you know who you actually are. What makes it easier is when you don't let others have influence on you, but in the society we live in it's almost impossible.

I'm not afraid anymore, I have a voice, I speak up, I am myself, the choices I make are not based on what is expected.
Now I'm finding myself and now I'm starting to know what I want.
The things I want are things that suit my personality, likes and believes.

What helped me in this process and could be of help for you:
-talk with like minded people
-surround yourself with people(and things) that give you positive vibes and find out who/what gives you negative vibes. Try to be around them as less as possible.
-try to always have your focus on the positive and not on the negative. Find the smallest positive things in everything you do, see and experience. Maybe make a gratitude book?

-read fitting books (the power of now, the law of attraction, quiet: the power of introverts, furiously name it!)
-the same goes for movies, tv shows, documentaries..
-Reflect on why you're feeling a certain why
-realize that what is expected(even when YOU expect it) might not be the best thing for your happiness
-know that it's oke to not know, doesn't matter where you are in life. Take your time!
-take enough 'you time' and make relaxing a rule
I just know this is not all and it's hard to say what 'does the trick', but if you try to do all of these things.. you will come a long way!

And let me tell you..we will search for things to want our entire lives!
Don't make a certain decision your only one. Maybe at one point you want something entirely different, just do it! 
For example a job, don't think about everything you had to do to get that one job.
If it doesn't make you happy anymore, change your course. 

We only have one life so better make the best of it!

maandag 12 december 2016

Breakfast Recipe | vegan cinnamon waffles + chocolate nicecream

This recipe is too easy and delicious not to share!
In my opinion waffles are like pancakes, but for lazy people haha.
You make the batter, put it in a waffle maker or a waffle mold (like me) and wait.
I made it less lazy and decided to make some nicecream to go with the waffles.

Don't feel like making the nicecream or you don't have the tools? Don't worry, I got ya!
Make the easy, jummy chocolate sauce instead ;)
(or make both..)
Being lazy? Top them with a nutbutter or strawberry jelly! Jumm.

For the waffels you'll need:
- 55gr (1/4 cup?) of flour (I used oat flour)
- As much cinnamon as you like, I used a lot!
- About 1/2 a tbsp of coconut sugar (depends on how sweet you want them to be)
- About a tsp of baking powder
- 1/2 a frozen ripe banana
- 1/2 cup plant milk (use any kind you like)
x Optional: vanilla, I used stevia vanilla drops
x Optional: raisins or anything else you want in your waffles.
Cacao nibs, chocolate, nuts?

For the nicecream you'll need:
- As much as frozen ripe bananas you like
- Cacao, I used a heaping tsp. For a rich cacao taste add a lot, otherwise add less
(leave out the cacao if you want a neutral taste and maybe add another flavouring like cinnamon, vanilla, strawberries or other fruit)

For the optional chocolate sauce you'll need:
- Agave syrup
- Cacao
- Water

How to make it:
1. Put the flour, baking powder and coconut sugar in a bowl. Whisk together.
2. Mash the banana in a bowl
3. Add the plant milk(optional: vanilla drops) and mix the milk and banana together
4. Mix the wet and dry ingredients together.
(The batter shouldn't be too runny and not too thick.)
5. Grab your mold  (or waffle maker) and pour the batter in!
In the airfryer: 180 degrees, 11 min
In the oven: 180 degrees, about 20 min
6. For the nicecream you can use as much frozen bananas as you like, put them in a mixing bowl(or food processor, high speed blender..)
7. Mix the nicecream with whatever you're using. I used my immersion blender!
8. Add a heaping tsp (or more or less) to the nicecream and mix again
9. Put the nicecream in the freezer until you're ready to use it
10. Time to plate up! Put you're waffles on a plate, grab your nicecram and
scoop it on top.
I topped it off with some homemade cinnamon granola

The chocolate sauce:1. Put some cacao in a small bowl, the amount depends on how thick or thin
you want the sauce to be
2. Add about 1/2 a tbsp agave syrup and a little bit of water
3. Mix together. First it will look like the cacao won't 'blend in', but eventually it will
4. Now add some more water, until you have the concistency you want

Enjoy! <3

vrijdag 11 november 2016


This word has a different meaning to every human being.
And I mean a bigger meaning then, well.. what the word means ofcourse.

Naked without your earrings
Naked without your long hair
Naked without your friends
Naked without alcohol when going out..

It means that you feel uncomfortable, or mot yourself even, without a certain factor.
Why? Why would we feel that way without it?
Aren't we enough for ourselves as we are?
If we believe we are, others will feel that way too,
And if not.. we attract how we act!
So other, better, people will come in your life who accept everything about you.

I feel most naked when I wipe my eyebrows off..

It sounds weird when I say it like that.
My eyebrows are a big struggle point for me, because I don't have them.
(there is some hair, but you can't see it)
I've even been bullied because of it.
I 'draw' them every morning again and again with powder on my face.
Always afraid they will disappear when it rains, when I go swimming and so on.
When did it start? When did I start feeling naked without my eyebrows?
I was born like that and up until one point I couldn't care less.
Well it started when people noticed it. People noticed it so I noticed it.
It went from only noticing to feeling bad about it, hiding it and eventually learning to draw them.

It's the mind playing tricks. It starts with one thought which you put in your head yourself or it is put there by others. The thought sits there and the mind loves to manipulate it and awaken the, so called, 'pain body' inside of us. We also feel like we are supposed to act to those thoughts.
We are not our minds so why listen to it?

I'm feeling less and less naked lately without drawing them.
The reason why I keep drawing them is because my face speaks more with eyebrows, but I don't depend on them being there anymore!

Be yourself, feel yourself, listen to yourself and not to your mind!

vrijdag 21 oktober 2016

The best bananabread!

First I want to say: all credits go to Yasmin from !

It's her recipe, thank you Yasmin for this amazing recipe <3

I've been back on the bananabread bandwagon for a few weeks now and it's mostly because of this recipe! Tried another one last week, but it just wasn't the same..
I made my fare share of bananabreads, also before going vegan, and this one is the best I've made so far! That's why I'm sharing this recipe, to make sure this recipe reaches as much bananabread lovers as possible ;)

I made some small adjustments for my bread:
-no nuts, but shredded coconut
-cookie spices (and cinnamon)
-'no egg' eggreplacer instead of the flax egg
-added apple cider vinegar to activate the baking soda


2 cups oat flour (make your own by blending oats 'till it's flour)
3 large spotty bananas, mashed
Optional: 1 more banana to top
1 cup pitted dates
1/2 cup unsweeetened non-dairy milk
2 tbsp flax seed powder or chia seeds + 6 tbsp water
2 tsp vanilla extract
1 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
Optional: 1/2 cup crushed nuts


1. Line a bread pan with parchment paper
2. Mix flax seed powder with water, stir well and leave it aside till gooey
3. In a big bowl add the flour with baking soda, baking powder, salt, cinnamon and mix well
4. Using a food processor(or hand mixer, high speed blender..) blend together the dates and liquids until smooth. Add the mashed banana and flax seed mixture and stir well. Add the date and banana mixture to the dry mixture; stir until combined. Add in the optional ingredients.
5. Scoop into the prepared pan. Optional: take the fourth banana, slice it in half lengthwise, and press into the top of the bread, cut side facing up
6. Bake for 50-60 minutes at 180 degrees (350 F) or until toothpick runs clean.
7. Let the bread cool down completely as it will be moist and hard to cut into when it's still hot.

So what are you waiting for? Go make this recipe!Unless you're waiting for your bananas to ripen up ofcourse..

dinsdag 18 oktober 2016

Random thoughts: raindrops

(tip: put on 'the rain' from Joe hisaishi on the background)
As I was walking through the rain I thought about how I never mind doing so.
I never despise the rain. I think it's because I know so deeply that it feeds everything we need and love. The soil, trees, plants.. and ofcourse it makes farmers very happy, especially after a dry period.

'I wonder where these drops came from?' was my next thought.
'Did they travel far?'
'Or not?'
Wish I was a raindrop.
Travelling without thought, just being.

When a cloud gets to heavy, it starts raining.
He let will let everything go.
Like some people do, when everything becomes too much.
They let everything go and disappear. Yes their physical body is still here, but not their spiritual body.

They gotta start from the beginning, start collecting raindrops again and forming a cloud.
That's where we have to stop.
Stop collecting emotions and tasks before it's too late, because the mind will take over and awakens your pain body.

When I was a kid I loved running through the rain in my bathing suit.
Wish I could do that again while being fully present. Without any forcing or thoughts.
Just happiness and feeling free..

I'm on a journey to have that feeling back and I'll tell you some things that really help me, maybe they will help you to..
-reflecting on certain thoughts and actions
-only doing what you truly want, not what is expected
-alone time
-not letting the mind wander
-don't force anything
-walking (through the forest, the shore..just a place you feel like)
-picking up lost, but loved hobby's
-do spontaneous and fun things. Keep surprising yourself with your own actions..

Walking through the rain is so refreshing and the smell after a rain shower.. so wonderfull.
It smells like pure nature, don't you think?

zondag 16 oktober 2016

Vivera meat replacers: fourth out of seven reviews

THIS BURGER..all day everyday please! Oke personally I wouldn't do that, but it IS that good!
It's the spicy bean burger who upgraded my meal today.
I had it with kind of a local dish(and it was my fave when I was a child!): boiled potatoes and rutabaga cooked in water with sugar and cinnamon>mashed together. Here we call it: knolletjes.
Before I went vegan I also put gravy on there and had a meatball or chicken afterwards.
I can only eat a meal like this when I have something extra, like a meat replacer!

Appearance: it looks crispy and damn tasty..on the inside there's a lot going on. Beans, corn, bell pepper, onion and more! This was my second taste test and in the first one I also saw wheat noodles (the oned used to make bami with)..
Texture: the outside gets quite crispy, but the inside stays soft. It has a nice bite thanks to the whole bean pieces.
Taste: when you're dutch you know what I mean with: bamischijf. Yes it tastes kinda like a bamischijf, but a bit spicy.
Ingredients: there's a lot going on on the ingredient list. It's 40% vegetables, soy protein, wheat flour, yeast, dextrose, salt, lots of herbs, corn starch, added B12 and iron..this is the only downside. Especially the wheat, but I understand why it's necessary.
Rating: Because of the taste I forget all about the ingredient list(and the wheat) so a 6/5!

dinsdag 11 oktober 2016

Vivera meat replacers: third out of seven reviews

Here it isss, a third review! I know there are big gaps between every review, but I don't want to eat meat replacers that often. Whole foods lover here haha!

That doesn't mean I don't like the taste of meat replacers, especially from this one..
This is Vivera's mushroom bell pepper burger and I love it! Had it once before on the same bun with the same veggies(spinach, tomato, pickles) and classic hummus. That combination is seriously the best, but lets get on with reviewing this burger shall we ;)

Appearance: it looks like a normal burger, round and a blend colour. It is quite big though and nothing wrong with it looking like a real burger, lots of people prefer it.
Texture: a firm and burger-like texture, really good!
Taste: the taste.. I can't describe it actually. It's just really delicious! It doesn't taste like mushroom or bell pepper or real meat, but it's definitely a good meat substitute. I think a meat eater would like it.
Ingredients: the main ingredients are mushrooms, bell pepper, soy protein, sunflower oil, potato starch, lots of herbs and some stuff to make it a firm and overall good burger. It contains wheat fiber so it's not gluten free.
Rating: hmm let me think..I'll give it a 5/5 WITH the bun, hummus and veggies.           4/5 if I would eat it without anything. Oh and because of the wheat fiber I wouldn't eat it that often ofcourse ;)

zondag 9 oktober 2016

Random thoughts: The danger with humans having animals for pets

So this morning I went to the forest with one of our dogs and my camera.
We played around and I took some pictures of her and nature, but also a certain thought came to my mind. I didn't allow myself to go deep into this thought, because I wanted to enjoy the walk and just be in the moment. When I got home I edited the pictures and decided to make a blog post about that thought+the pictures I took ofcourse ;)

dinsdag 4 oktober 2016

Random night thoughts: life frightens me

Sometimes when I lay in bed at night and I can't sleep right away, the most random things come to my mind. I bet that's the case with most of us.
Sometimes they're nice thoughts, smart ideas, dreaming about winning the jackpot.. and sometimes they are thoughts that make you freak out a bit. This is one of them..

To tell the truth, life frightens me.
Sometimes it feels like thoughts about the future are able to strangle me just thinking about it.
On one side you have the things you know they're going to happen, but you don't know the exact course it will take. Like going on a trip or an upcoming exam.
On the other side, and this is the biggest part, you really don't know what will come to you in life and what will happen. ''How do I evolve in life? Where will I end up? Will certain people still be in my life a couple of years from now?''
These questions make the choices you have to make in life hard. Even the smallest choices like ''Should I go left or right here?''
It's easy so say 'follow your heart', because other people and even your own mind can trick you into thinking that you want different things. The mind is a powerfull tool and we have to learn to controll it, otherwise it will controll us

Should we fear the unknown or embrace it?
I'll say it like this: I want to embrace it. What would life be if there weren't any surprises? Unexpected 'change of plans'? But I can't embrace it..not just yet.
I fear the unknown.
''Is this the right education for me and will I end up somewhere I'll be happy?''
''Should I save money or spend it and live more? But what if it turns out I badly need it somewhere in the future..''

I'm trying to find peace with it all by finding inner peace with myself.
It's hard finding that peace when you don't feel life is in peace with you, or is trying to.

What's your take on a subject like this?
We can't change anything about the unknowing in life, but we can talk about our thoughts on this subject.

So this was something I wrote a few weeks before launching my blog and I wanted to put it up. In the mean time I grew so much and reading The power of now helped me so much with handling thoughts like this! I know they're still wandering around in my head, but I don't let them come out anymore. Still, it is a subject I want to talk about with others. How you guys handle it or do YOU need tips/help?

''Realize deeply that the present moment is all you ever have''

zondag 2 oktober 2016

Vivera meatreplacers: second out of seven reviews

Last night I felt like adding something to my veggie stirfry and I was lucky to have these :)
So that means.. a second review!

A while ago I had their normal chicken pieces which I really liked and these are the: chicken pieces chili lemon flavored. Hmm sounds good..

Appearance: it looks like..prepared marinated chicken. It scares some people of, but I really don't mind if it's not real meat. What I do mind is that some pieces are really small or more crumbs and other pieces are bigger. 
Texture: Sooo good! Not as firm as chicken, but the texture comes really close. The inside looks JUST like chicken. The pieces really add something to your veggie stirfry, pasta dish, risotto.. you name it!
Taste: I love the chili lemon flavour! Ok you can't really taste lemon, but the overall taste is good. The chili spice is there, but people who are afraid of spicy food could also just eat this. Does it taste like chicken? No it doesn't. On the background you can taste it's own flavour, my guess from the soy ;)
Ingredients: no wheat, big plus!! It's mostly soy, sunflower oil, pea fiber, lots of herbs and some sugar. Oh and quite high in protein for people who are interested in that ;)
Rating: 4 stars out of 5. The flavour is good, texture also and wheat free.. I would buy them. Tastes better than chicken in my opinion!
(so sorry for the picture quality, but autumn is coming so the sunlight is going..) 

 Pandan rice, oyster mushrooms, bell pepper and the chicken pieces!

donderdag 29 september 2016

Vivera meat replacers: first out of seven reviews

Halleeelujah Vivera! Didn't expect the content of the package you guys send me..
I knew there was a package coming, but I thought with only 1 product.
I contacted them because I couldn't figure out if the (gipsy) schnitzel I bought was already veganized or not.. it was not :( They offered to send me the veganized one. what a service!
So the package arrived and it was quite big for one product..I opened the package and there were seven kinds of 100% plantbased meat replacers!

To thank them I will review each one of them with some pretty pictures and an honest opinion :)

The first one is the Pumpkin sweet potato burger, sounds reaaally good right? So different from all the veganized burgers, chicken pieces, ground beef etc!
Appearance: the burger has a pretty yellowish colour, it looks like it's going to be delicious.
Texture: pretty awesome. Firm, but not too firm. It's like..a hamburger!
Taste: I had to get used to it. Didn't like it straight away, but the second time I ate the burger..I loved the different taste :) it's kinda sweet, but not in a dessert/candy kind of way. All thanks to the sweet potato and pumpkin ofcourse! Oh and you don't need any sauce with it. Just eat it blend, not on a bun or anything! Taste is good as it is ;)
Rating: 3 stars out of 5! It wouldn't be the first thing I would choose in the supermarket(if there were more products), but I definitely wouldn't mind eating it again. 
I heard other people who reaaally loved this burger and want to eat it everyday!
So don't mind me, I just like other things more ;)

dinsdag 27 september 2016

This is me, this is my story!

Helloooo there!
I've been active on instagram for a while now as some might know.
I started being active on social media when I started eating healthy and working out, because there's a big 'fitness' community on IG and on other social platforms. So nice to see everyone inspiring and helping eachother!
All this time being active I never really introduced myself.. yeah pictures and posts say something about a person (and I'm not shy on sharing and telling things), but I don't think it tells who I am.
It's about time I introduce myself properly. Who I am, what I like, what keeps me busy and so on!
Oh and also my story behind the 'fitness and healthy eating' stuff.. never shared it and I don't know why, because I'm really not shy on sharing personal stuff.

Here the boring details:

Geke (Gee-ku) Keuter
20 (09-01-1996)
I live together with:
Both of my parents, 1 older sister and 2 younger twin sisters+3 dogs and 1 crazy parrot
Hobby's and the stuff which interest me:
-Photography (thanks to horses)
-Horses (natural horsemanship)
-Food and health (Since February 2016; only vegan foods)
-the mind
-music (rock, metal, alternative music.. all 'good' music actually!)
(it took me a long time to have an answer to the next 2 questions)
Favorite movie:
Dirty dancing (the first one) and Spirit: stallion of the cimarron(no it's not a joke)
Favorite book:
The power of now
This year I finished my study for doctor's assistant (yay for me), but.. I don't feel finished with school just yet! At the moment I'm taking a leap year for myself and to earn some money before going back to school. After this year I want to start with a study called: International Food&Agribusiness.
What my character is like:
I would say I'm quite a sensitive person. Not only sensitive for my own experiences, but I also feel what others feel. When you cry, I will cry with you kinda thing.
I'm loving. I love my family, friends, animals and the people I interact with. I'm not one for shallow relationships, I like to connect on a deeper level. I'm most likely to connect with people which share the same mindset/thoughts etc.
I don't dislike someone fast and I'm not one to judge on someones behavior, but when I do dislike someone..they're really in my black book. Most likely for life.
Lately I'm trying to let go of the people who have a negative effect on my life..
I always try to stay away from bullshit and people talking crap and/or causing trouble when there is nothing wrong. What's more..I'm eager to learn, to improve myself and my knowledge, discover things.. I think you know the drill!
I like to be by myself and do my thing, but I also love it to be with good company. And I mean only good company! People I can have a good time with and have good, meaningfull talks with.
Some other things: i'm not good in making decisions, I change my mind a lot, I like to have control over things happening in my life/around me.
So.. that's quite an expanded answer. Best is to meet in real life ofcourse! I just looove to meet people in real life who I met online :D

Now time for the hardest part.. my story!
So I guess it's not a shocker when I tell you I had an eating disorder.
Most girls saying: there's a story behind all of this had/have an ED.
With me it didn't start with wanting to lose weight, there are lots of reasons why it started and it goes very deep. I've always been quite emotional, insecure, afraid of the future etc.
Dealed with some depressions when I was younger, but never told anyone.
Looking back I realize I actually had a tough youth.. at the time everything seemed like it was just.. life happening? But now I know where my social anxiety, depressions and all that came from.
(Now I seem like a really 'worried' child/teenager, but in my own circle of people I was different ofcourse. I did, and still, like a good laugh)
It all went 'wrong' when I had to sell my horse (when I was 14) and other things happening around school and my relationship at the same time(the birth control pill also caused depression)

I signed up at the local gym to kill free time, but when I start something I go all the way..
So I started to adjust my food intake. Had to eat more healthy and needed more protein right? (wish I could talk sense to myself at that time)
From that point the ED started, if not before that. I actually don't know anymore.
The feeling of having that controll over my body felt so good, it gave me a 'purpose' or something, I felt like I was good at something. Also I loved to be in the 'instagram fitness community', all those girls sharing things and doing the same thing.
But I wasn't myself anymore. Went from being a shy kid to an outgoing teenager and back to a shy insecure (older) teenager/yound adult.. felt insecure in groups, wanted to be by myself all the time, I was reaally cranky to my family and tried to avoid them. I even was a bitch to my dogs and thought it was a waste of time to cuddle with them or take them for a nice walk. My mindset was: be productive, all the time.
I won't go into detail about how much(how little actually) I ate, how much I worked out, how horrible and weak I felt (sometimes I almost fainted at work), because that shit is the past and I don't want to trigger anyone!

(I don't have a lot of picures from that time, because I didn't feel comfortable making pictures of myself. But on the first picture I already lost some weight as you can see and on the second my face is so narrow and the smile so empty.. I have and always had 'chubby' cheeks so that's kinda weird to see)

How it came to an end?  I knew I had a disordered relationship with food, but I thought everything was under control and my complaints didn't came from that blabla..
I told everyone at home(which wasn't a big shocker, but they never realized how bad it was) and wanted to recover on my own terms. Started increasing my intake, but still healthy and didn't stop weight lifting. After a while I did stop doing cardio and that helped with gaining weight!
I gained some weight quite fast and I was at my goal weight at the beginning of this year.
When I knew I didn't fear any foods anymore and felt myself again(I was sooo afraid I could never find myself back anymore) I allowed myself to become vegan! BEST FCKING DECISION EVER! It did sooo much good for my mental health.
Oh and I stopped ALL excercise, because my period is staying away. I didn't have my period in 2,5 years I guess. Went to the doctor, did a blood test: I don't have a deficiency in any vitamin and my hormone levels are perfect. So I have to be patient and wait for it to come back..
(HA! non-vegans, shove your arguments about vitamin deficiency up your ass)

My whole life I had bowel problems(also one of the reasons for my ED) and thanks to my ED I made those problems worse..I'm trying to heal my gut for a while now, but I think it's impossible. Only when I avoid gluten and processed food the complaints are to a minimum. The bloating, gass and painfull stomach can make me very insecure and feeling really down sometimes. It makes me wonder what in the hell I'm doing wrong. And thanks to those problems I'm still 'obsessed' with my food intake, because I can't just eat everything. Thankfully I now kinda know what to avoid and what makes my body happy :)

At this point I'm trying to find the right balance in everything: food, mindset, excercise, alone time and spending time with others, being productive and relaxing.. Going vegan changed my view on everything! Most of all: I love more! Not only love for other earthlings, but also myself <3

''re vegan now.. is that not ed/orthorexic behavior?''
For a very long time I wanted to become vegetarian, ever since I was a little kid.
My parents and everyone around me told me it's normal to eat meat and we can't live without it.
When I was getting more into healthy food(while the ed started)I came to the conclusion that 'too much' animal products weren't good. That we should also get our protein from plant sources.
It was a big struggling point for me, because my mindset was still: 'we need animal products and it's my ed talking that I shouldn't eat processed animal products', but I also really wanted to keep it to a didn't feel good to eat meat, dairy and eggs. At the point where I felt recovered I allowed myself to become fully vegan! After being vegetarian for one month.
I have one rule for myself, because I never EVER want to feel like I'm restricting myself: If I really want to eat something, I eat it! Doesn't matter if my stomach hurts, how full I am contains something from an animal.. and yes I dare to say that out loud, because I know I will never want to eat something which contains ANYTHING from an animal!

What I also want to point out: after my ED I actually never went back to craving 'junkfood/unhealthy food'.. I genuily want to eat whole plantbased foods <3

(I forgot to mention that somehwere in this story I got together with my boyfriend <3
He knew me way before the ED, during and after.
Lucky for me he kept sticking around)